Wednesday, December 28, 2005

IKEA POANG armchair

IKEA POANG armchair

Sorry I've not been posting much but a good Christmas was had. Lots of family stuff squeezed in. Forgot just how much happy, cheerful & loud the whole family can be.

I've now got a Poang armchair...I daresay I'll be getting up a lot less.

Everton are getting worryingly garbage again. Consequetive 4-0 defeats, no fight and the derby to come tonight. Grim times, most of my mates are blue and there isn't a lot of cheer going on. I got myself a Waterloo shirt as did another of my mates...we both wore them to the same party and were laughed at (fair enough).

Managed to survive the sales...we walked there. Very good idea, the traffic was ludicrous. My mate Mary went at that's dedication! I got myself a new suit with the minimum of fuss so my quest to "scrub up quite well" is progressing nicely.

In work today and then straight off to the Black Horse.......COYB please!

Monday, December 19, 2005

downs and ups

Well..............Everton do depress you. 0-4 at home to fecking Bolton. Oddly enough we actually didn't play that badly...we had most of the play but they punished us every time we slipped up. Sickeningly depressing. On the upside It'll be months before I have to sit through a game involving Bolton again.

Trudged home and checked teletext for the rugby scores. 'loo won with a bonus whilst Mosely and Esher both lost (the latter being 15-0 up at half time).

There are rumours doing the rounds that three teams will end up getting promoted from National Division 2...this'd be great 'cause the three teams up there at the moment are all playing really well.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

Waterloo R.F.C. - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Waterloo R.F.C. - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

All my own work......not too bad.

Everton battled and scrapped for a point at Old Trafford...we could have even have won it at the end (although they could possibly have had a penalty given). Killer broke forward an a mazy run pulling three or four players, Osman wrked the ball into their vacant right back position for McFadden to surge into the box and lash a scorching low shot between Van der Saar and the near post. A much maligned trio come up trumps for the blues. After that Beattie ran his socks off and Richard Wright pulled off some superb stops to keep us in the game. Tremendous stuff from a pretty threadbare squad.

Phil Neville is becoming more of a hero with each passing game.

Daily Mirror article on Phillip

We are now one of the form teams in the league.

Monday, December 05, 2005

Discover Music - Pandora

Discover Music - Pandora

Great music'll take your faves, analyse them and keep playing similar songs.

On the sports field we watched a 30 mud-men slosh round St Anthony's in a top-of-the-table clash between 'loo and Esher. Esher's website seems to think Waterloo are lucky that conditions were the way they were whilst their team struggled manfully like the Barbarians of old to play fantastic rugby. Either way it ended in a rainy mud-sodden draw...not a bad result but out of Esher, Waterloo and Mosely one of them is going to be disappointed at the end of the season.

Everton are continueing their revival.......thank God. On Saturday we earned another 3 points against a very robust Blackburn. We took the lead via James McFadden and soon after their skipper was sent off for a deliberate handball.....kind of harsh but after so many weeks of rotten luck we've had descisions go for us in the last two games. Arteta scored a lovely goal just before the break et voila.

This is the first 'cushion' we've had this year. Before Saturday we'd took 13 points from 5 efficient is that!

Beattie is looking better and better....he was lively again this week and although goals aren't coming his contribution is good (that clearance of the line last week easily negates the late miss).


Wednesday, November 30, 2005

Winter wonderland

Wintery conditions this week...lots of nice snowy and freezing rain to drive through in the morning.

The FA have let Alan Shearer off with his blatant, cynical elbow again Davie Weir whilst pulling Tim Cahill up for his dust up with Celestine Babayaro. It's pathetic but not exactly unexpected, remember Alan booting Neil Lennon in the face years ago.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005


England's flawed brilliance makes for some tremendous test we collapsed just that little bit too much. First blood to Pakistan.

Well done to Jones and Udal for their stout resistance.

Tuesday, November 15, 2005


I can't think of any reason to include this piccie apart from it being so cool.

Cricket going well...driving to work is so much nicer when you can listen to Test Match Special on Radio4 long-wave.

Monday, November 14, 2005

English heart

Saturday 12th November 2005 : What a truly wonderful day to be English.

From the moment I woke up and tuned to TMS on 5live sports extra 'til the moment I stumbled in worse for wear hours after the final whistle of the Argentina game I could scarcely ask for more.

Watched the start of the rugby in Waterloo RFC clubhouse (which was enjoying a pound a pint day on Cains Lager) with a load of boisterous scousers and some equally enthusiastic cockney types (Blackheath being from East London). At 3pm strolled out to watch 'loo win in some style capturing a bonus point again too. Having heard the bar staff wax lyrical about how well England had played against Australia we then settled into the bar to watch the truly superb footy match whilst the club sent out plates of free food. Luckily the food had been consumed by the end of the game 'cause the place was rocking when we scored those two goals. Content, grinning & strangers had been hugged, beer had been quaffed and I'd reached the high water mark on my drunkenness...we grabbed a seat and sat back to grin and smile as Great Britain's mud-humpers put the cherry on top by besting the Kiwis. Just to make our dominance global we learnt that some golf chappie had left the Grand Union's finest in his wake too.

Excellent stuff summed in three words "Happy and glorious".

Waterloo is continuing to gain fans.....this time we had 10 or so, hope to do it quite regularly. Indeed some of my friends from Crosby are thinking of joining.

Friday, November 11, 2005

Poppy Appeal 2005

Poppy Appeal 2005

They shall not grow old as we who are left grow old.
Age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun and in the morning,

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

England suffer embarrassing loss

England suffer embarrassing loss

Not the best starts to England's tour of Pakistan....A loss to their A side and the possibility of Vaughan being out with knee ligament damage. They say Pakistan is one of the toughest places to tour so this doesn't help.

I did chuckle in the previous warm up game when the bbc reported that Ashley Giles was missing for a day with "The traditional problem" euphamism use there. I also remember Jonathon Agnew having to choke and cough his way through the update after eating what he thought was a green bean that turned out to be a mercilessly hot chilli.

Hope Vaughan is okay.

Monday, November 07, 2005

Everton didn't lose AGAIN!

Woohoo.....another tight, tight win. Beattie netted from a van der Meyde cross et voila 75 minutes of tension. It's never easy with us. They could and possible should have scored but then again we hit the bar too. Now it feels like things are back on track with van der Meyde and Arteta working well on the wings. Hopefully Beattie can keep going. We still look like we lack a cutting edge but now at least we've started getting the breaks when chances come our way.

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Everton didn't lose

In fact we won!!!!!!! Yay!

Chuffed to bits 'cause we just haven't been getting the breaks recently despite an upturn in form. COYB!

Me and Anne went to Buxton to get some fresh air outdoorsy type time before the weather turns nasty. We went up onto the hill overlooking the town and into some extremely interesting caves and generally spent time nosing about, eating and sitting in pubs.

We managed to pick up a stray after getting toalking to a group of friends. It turns out that one of them was going to Liverpool the next night to spend 7 hours at John Lennon Airport. It's kind of odd asking someone you've only just met to come and stay with you but it's more weird to know that someone you are chatting to will be sitting in an airport (not two miles from your house) for over a quarter of a day.

Anyway nice weekend.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Things I learnt last night

They don't call it "The Moan Stand" for nothing.

Whinge, whinge, whinge....Everton are a team low on confidence...bleating at the players isn't going to help. No-one ever plays better for having 10,000 people tell him he's sh*te. At one point Beattie dropped 30 yards to receive a ball from Kilbane which he worked insider for Neville (I think) to work forward and someone behind me rewarded his effort with an angry shout of "Get in the box Beattie".

We lost again...although I reckon we were the better side. We just have no cutting edge whatsoever.

The crowd was very flat which isn't usually the case on these League Cup nights and it certainly wasn't the case for the Bucharest game (a game we had virtually no-hope of winning)...We should have got behind them 'cause they are definitely showing signs of improving. Arteta was ace on the right and van der Meyde came on and looking pretty good on the left.


Monday, October 24, 2005

Couldn't escape if I wanted to

WATERLOO RUGBY Official Website

Crammed a lot in this weekend. On Friday went to see Wallace & Gromit (Very good) and on Saturday managed to make it along to St Anthony's Road for Waterloo V Manchester. Lovely club, very welcoming and friendly...Ace, ace bar too. Cains Lager is lovely. I've been hoping to try it for a while after Anne spotted it on a night out and gave it a whole-hearted thumbs up.

Drank far too many pints of it and as a consequence was pretty much useless for most of Saturday evening. Waterloo played really well too and overcame a 0-12 deficit to easily run-out winners...nabbed that all important bonus point too. Top time had by all (although the blokie I was with, Mark, insisted on sticking on the Stella Artois when the delights of Cains Lager & Bitter plus Deuchars IPA were on offer).

Will hopefully be doing that again very soon.

The advantage of afternoon drinking means you neatly sidestep the hangover so I was almost fighting fit for Everton V Chelsea on Sunday. There wasn't much optimism going into the game but we set off from the Black Horse determined to do the team proud. Despite there being a fair few seats empty we really got behind them. I know full houses and vociferous support should go without saying for the blues but these are lean times (how long was it since we scored).

Anyway we went toe to toe with them and we took the lead via a James Beattie pen (won after Cahill robbed Sean Wright Phillips and he rather impetuously hacked him down at the very edge of the box). James had to wait a while before taking it and I was sure he was going to miss but he blasted it into the roof of the net.

Bearing in mind the five 2nd half goals the Pensioners scored last week there was a bit of trepidation around going into the 2nd half. They equalised fairly quickly from a superb Lampard goal (I thought it had come from a foul thow) but we didn't buckle or capitulate and could well have had another pen from a blatant John Terry handball...saying that on another day they might have had another goal from Drogba. True enough Gudjonson was off but didn't touch the ball but if you aren't interfering with play stood on the penalty spot as the ball is played through then when are you?


Sunday, October 23, 2005

Nice poem

'When you get what you want in your struggle for self
And the world makes you king for a day,
Just go to the mirror and look at yourself
And see what that man has to say

For it isn't your father or mother or wife
Whose judgment upon you must pass
The fellow whose verdict counts most in your life
Is the one staring back from the glass

You may be like Jack Horner and chisel a plum
And think you're a wonderful guy.
But the man in the glass says you're only a bum
If you can't look him straight in the eye.

He's the fellow to please - never mind all the rest,
For he's with you clear to the end And you've passed your most dangerous, difficult test
If the man in the glass is your friend.

You may fool the whole world down the pathway of years
And get pats on the back as you pass.
But your final reward will be heartache and tears If you've cheated the man in the glass.'

Friday, October 21, 2005

It was 200 years ago today...

...Admiral Nelson drove the French away!

The Gentleman's Magazine, LXXV (November 1805), pp. 1044-1045

Let others hail the rising sun!
I bow to that whose race is run.

'Twas noon, when England's gallant fleet
The sails of France and Spain discern'd;
Or victory or death to meet
Each British tar with ardour burn'd.

Destructive showers of bullets fly;
The scuppers flow with streams of blood;
Harsh thunders rend the vaulted sky;
Fierce lightnings blaze along the flood.

Undaunted NELSON foremost stands—
The cause his Country's and his King's
When, lo! to aid the Gallic bands,
From Hell malignant Envy springs.

In human guise, at length to stop
The Hero's bright meridian fame,
From Santa Trinidada's top
She takes, alas! too sure an aim.

Th' envenom'd shot deep-pierc'd his heart,
A heart disdainful of all blows
By man directed:—But, what art
Can guard against infernal foes?

Two Spanish crews with pride advance.
The Temeraire seem'd nearly won;—
When Victory snatch'd the flags of France,
And strew'd them o'er her favourite son.

The splendors of proud Gaul are past!
Britannia mourns her NELSON'S fall.
E'en foes shall deck his grave:—THEIR MAST

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

Comin' straight outta Netherton

Teenager fires BB gun in my old school

Well, whilst almost every Old Ambrosian I've spoken to is pretty negative about the place it was certainly not that bad when I was there.

Also recently it was meant to be on the up...just goes to show you.

It was not the most academic of places...I reckon a lot of the people who came out with average GCSEs should have got good marks. I myself got 3 Bs and 5 Cs but we were never even told about college or wasn't really presented as a goal for us. Careers advice seemed to consist of "Which one should I put you down for? British Gas apprenticeship or The Army?"...I'm not trying to make out I was Oxbridge material (you've seen my spelling for starters) but you'd think there was more to life than that.

Friday, October 14, 2005

BBC NEWS | World | Americas | Snake bursts after gobbling gator

BBC NEWS World Americas Snake bursts after gobbling gator

Well that clears that one up...A draw.

Lion Vs Tiger, Orca Vs Great White & Bear Vs Gorrilla still to be decided.

It'd be pretty unlucky to get eat by a snake and find a live, angry alligator waiting for you in it's stomach.

Monday, October 10, 2005


England............What's to be done. I just can't be arsed. The games are just so mediocre at the moment. We have qualified for the world cup and yet people have barely batted an eyelid. At the weeked we all tripped down to Barracuda in town to watch the game and while our intentions were honourable after half time we barely glanced at the screen. This is unusual as generally I am the one who's really enthusiastic about England games.

Aside from the uninspiring match we dranks lots of beer and had a good time. The Barracuda has a truly bizarre array of adult type vending machines in it's toilets but we resisted the temptation to invest in an inflatable sheep.

In other news Scotland somehow managed to lose to Belarus therefore ending their world cup hopes (typical, they do the hard work and then stumble at the last) and Ireland kept their hopes alive with a tight win against Cypress.

The best game would have been Northern Ireland against Wales which finished 2-3 with a good comeback from Ulster being pegged back.

Also Lovell Rugby got my new rugby top to me in world record time (1 working day!!!! tremendous).

Lovell Rugby

Thanks chaps.

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

Happy Super-Birthday

Well then another happy year on the board. 31 of them chalked up now. Being the landed gentry nowadays I got a fair bit of gardening stuff but that's fine by me as I have a lot of projects in mind (I won't bore you with them here but it's amazing how much you get sucked into gardening). Anne got me a woodburner for the patio so I think I'll be looking forward to some pyro-maniac moments too.

My mate's daughter, who is only one and a bit years old, managed to learn how to send me this e-card :

October is well and truly the birthday season...Two good mates of mine, Paul Cunningham and Carmel Wilde both share my birthday and Flynny who I've known since god-knows-when has his tomorrow. The father of our little e-carder has his birthday on the eve of St Crispins day.

Carmel texted me to tell me she was being taken for a champagne breakfast down in Royal Leamington Spa where she works...then 20 minutes later she texted back to tell me that it was just Bucks Fizz sans champers (It did strike me as a but early I have to say).

In other news the fellow I work with here in Manchester who spent yesterday mocking me with the typical thieving scouser jokes had his wheel trims stolen from outside his house last night...Good old God, Sometimes not so mysterious. I got to sit back and say "Well of course in the Capital of Culture we can afford alloy wheels."

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

Play the game

Played footy last night and was, of course, ace ;)

It's always good to have a game of 5-a-side...Have been playing for years with the same gang of people so it's pretty levels ebb and flow but nowadays well seem to be wearing more bandages and failing fitness tests more often.

My brother played for the first time in 2 years...he struggled a bit which was kind of funny but as per usual a good time was had by all. At one point I, for some unfathomable reason, decided to focus only the ball and run full pelt into Mike Summers......this has left me with a rather bruised nipple where his elbow caught me, very painful.

After footy nipped to St Benets now it's been decorated it's been described as "Less Phoenix Nights and more Boogie Nights"...not sure if it's completely Phoenix-free but it's still a friendly enough place and it doesn't mind a bunch of stinky, humid lads trooping in straight after playing footy. There is no pint like the post-footy pint on Tuesday.

St Benets is a really nice the moment I am going to St Francis in Garston because an old school friend of mine, Fr Ron, is parish priest there. St Benet's will always be home though. A nice little community & we've been very lucky over the years with some ace priests Fr O'Reilly, Fr Paul "Figo" Fegan and Fr Sean to name a few.

Fr O'Reilly was an irishman who built it up from nothing when Liverpool expended and Scotland Road, the old Catholic area of the city, was cleared and the people dispersed to new suburbs. He was an old school priest. If he said pray you said "Alleluia". Figo is actually more of a family friend than a parish priest and actually used to play five-a-side with us. Fr Sean is the current priest and is another lovely bloke. There are plenty of others I could wax lyrical about, I remember one priest who REALLY hated communists and used to deliver real blood & thunder sermons about it. I remember seeing little old ladies walking out in disgust as he shook his fist and called Chairman Mao a "little bastard" (as kids we thought it was the coolest thing ever).

Monday, October 03, 2005

Oh God

Another weekend, another defeat for the blues with out a goal scored. I'm not screaming for people to resign or anything but not signing a striker before the start of the season was little short of dereliction of duty.



Friday, September 30, 2005


Me and Anne went to the UEFA cup game along with 21,841 others...It was a good game and the depleted crowd really got behind them. The team player really well in the first half but Bucharest where never in danger (apart from when Ferguson went ape and attacked one of their players).

We won the game 1-0 but after Bucharest had whethered the first half storm (when, to be fair, we could have been 3-0 up) they were never in danger. Two minutes from the end as the game trickled towards it's conclusion one of their players tried to cripple Mikel Arteta leaving him unconcious & convulsing on the floor. It was quite upsetting, the other players were waving frantically to the bench and the player lay there writhing. The Gwladys sang his name as he was stretchered off (I always remember Tommy Gravesen waving to us as he was stretchered off the pitch in a neck brace).

A sad way to end our abortive European adventure. I am not too gutted though. The players played well, Cahill looked more energetic, Valente and Ferrari look like they can do well for us and besides which the UEFA cup is shite. If UEFA aren't going to bother with it (no sponsors, no money, no hype, no coverage) then why should we.


Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Google Earth

Google Earth

One of the coolest things ever...especially now you can share you placemarks with the world. Great idea.

Monday, September 26, 2005

Rock bottom

We are bottom of the premiership after another 1-0 defeat this time to's is getting very worrying 'cause we just cannot score goals and look like getting hit by a sucker punch each & every week.
McFadden played up front this week and for the first time in ages the ball seemed to stick. The midfield had balance which is better than we've been able to say for a while. Cahill, Osman and Davies seemed pretty anonymous...Whenever McFadden had the ball there was no following up. If we can get ourselves a goal you feel things would swing round. We had one dissallowed this week.

Hopefully the fightback will start soon. Hopefully.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

The only thing to fear...

I am alarmed how quick everything has turned bleak for the blues. It just feels so grim...we are only 5 games in, okay we've only got 3 points but every blue I talk to is in thorough depression. I think the Villareal game has left everyone pretty deflated. Interestingly enough Everton only got 6 points from the corresponding fixtures last year. Let's hope things aren't heading towards crisis. We shall not be moved. The People's Club will abide and prevail (hopefully).

Friday, September 16, 2005

Moyes confesses to 'lowest ebb'

Moyes confesses to 'lowest ebb'

Jesus that was hard to take......I've never seen Everton get so thoroughly humiliated. We were in control in the first half but we were rotten in th 2nd. How does this happen?

The midfield were's worrying. There seems to be a malaise descended on the club since the Villareal game. Arsenal away next......

Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Open-top bus celebration for England heroes - England - ECB

Open-top bus celebration for England heroes - England - ECB

That was one of THE great sporting contests....I don't think we can doubt that now. One day to bat and the ashes were ours...but yet again those Aussies came back at us and at 126-5 it looked like we'd choked and snatched defeat from the jaws of victory...Kevin Pietersen took the field facing Glenn McGrath on a hatrick...he had is wobbles but his knock of 158 was astounding. Under that sort of pressure he hit 7 sixes and 15 fours. Fantastic

If - Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man my son!

My mate Rufus is featured in The Telegraph's Ashes 4th day montage...he was dressed as a Raj era redcoat escorting someone dressed as a convict...he is immensely proud.

Freddie Flintoff has been off the beer all summer in preperation for this series and by the looks of him he played catch-up last night. He was battered having not stopped celebrating since close of play yesterday. Bless him, he mumbled and stumbled his way through the day's events with a goofy drunken smile on his his face whilst Vaughan, KP and the others looked fresh as daisies (Apparently KP ran Fred a close second). My fave quotes about it all are thus

"It's 6.15am, there are empty bottles of champagne and beer glasses everywhere, it's a scene of almost total destruction and in the middle of the empties... Andrew Flintoff, he's been up all night and has just started again...."

Our survey says :

Monday, September 12, 2005

The final day

Too nervous to post anything :

There's a breathless hush in the close to-night
Ten to make and the match to win
A bumping pitch and a blinding light,
An hour to play, and the last man in.
And it's not for the sake of a ribboned coat.
Or the selfish hope of a season's fame,
But his captain's hand on his shoulder smote
"Play up! Play up! And play the game!"

Friday, September 09, 2005

5th Test: England v Australia at The Oval, 8-12 Sep 2005

5th Test: England v Australia at The Oval, 8-12 Sep 2005

Yesterday was Australia's day...or to be more accurate Shane Warne. It'd be churlish not to doff your hat to him. England were motoring along until he got the ball then wickets started falling with alarming regularity. Straus and Flintoff put on a great stand but we collapsed late on leaving the old enemy with the upper hand. Pray for resiliance and rain.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

There goes nothing....Here goes nothing

Good God last night was crippling...England got beaten off the park by Northern Ireland! Ultster!! ULSTER!!! and not even all of Ulster!!!!!! God knows how bad it would have been if they'd have had Counties Cavan, Monaghan and Donegal too! We were clueless from start to finish. There was no will to win from England, no pride...they had it in spades, they out-worked us and smothered from the first whistle to the last...for them it was simply a matter of taking their chance when it came.

Something rotten in the England football camp...

The England cricket camp has a big problem going into the deciding of best bowlers is out, he had the choice of going like-for-like and slotting James Anderson into the side or augmenting the batting line-up with solid all-rounder Paul Collingwood. Both decisions have their merits but in the end we went with the latter.

30 minutes from now it all begins....COME ON ENGLAND.

Wednesday, September 07, 2005

Travels and returns

My bro got back from his year a-backapacking at the weekend...nice to have him back safe and sound altohugh I feel sorry for him 'cause I remember how much fun it was whilst travelling.

If I won the lottery I'd do that for the rest of my was so much fun, utterly carefree and above all unbelievably interesting.

He's currently lording it over us 'cause he went to 19 countries to our's great having him back 'cause there's been no-one to argue/debate with whilst he's been away...we have it down to a fine art. I figure I have the better of him on this 'cause we went to India on our trip (which was a totally different world) and he bottled out of it...also we got to go Rarotonga which truly was paradise. He makes some very good pionts about going to see Machu Pichu and the Nazca lines and getting all the way down to Tiera del Fuego....the debate will run and run.


Monday, September 05, 2005


Funny how things happening half a world away suddenly seem so close. My old pen-pal Aimee lost everything in Hurricane Katrina, virtually all her posessions gone overnight...her folks lost all that plus their home. They are all okay though, when you look at the poor bastards down in New Orleans.

Some really nice people I met on the way to and from Lourdes popped up on the news as their son, daughter-in-law and grandson were trapped in the middle of the it turns out they were in the Superdome and are safe and sound too thank God.

The aftermath is something to debate...It's easy to lash out in anger after a crisis but you have to ask questions about how the aftermath was allowed to descend into such a shocking mess.

Friday, September 02, 2005


The Official Website of Sleater-Kinney

Went to see Sleater-Kinney in Manchester last night...they are ace. The support band (the pippettes) were AWFUL (3 girls doing a Grease/The Go-Gos inspired set that seem to revolve primarily around synchronised hand movements).

It was a relief when SK came on. Janet is a superb drummer...she also played mouth organ whilst drumming away (and has been known to play guitar whilst drumming too). Top stuff.

Tuesday, August 30, 2005


Phew......I know we all thought this Ashes series would be dramatic but this is getting stupid. For the first test in a row there was hardly anything between the two teams. England once again got themselves into a winning position only for the Aussies to fight themselves back into the game. We made the best team in the world follow-on for the first time in 17 years.

Unlike the last two matches this time it was England batting for a result and depaite only needing 129 to win it was left to Hoggard and Giles to scrape and claw the winning's a close run thing (understatment of the epoch). When Australia looked dead and bured the England fielders were tearing round the ground chasing the ball for all they were worth...I lost count of the times they turned 4s and 3s into 2s and seemed needless at the time but it made all the difference. The team are giving everything every single time a ball is bowled...they know they are good enough to match the Australians and they know their efforts can make all the difference. England just need to avoid defeat in the final test at The Oval (a few good knocks or one bloody good rain storm) and the urn is ours.

The way this series is going it is going to go down as one of the greatest sporting contests in history. You've got the two best teams in the world taking each other all the way week in, week out.

Ponting is rather spoiling things by complaining about England's use of subsititute fielders (a trick the Aussies first used back in the days of Dennis Lillie) because he was run out by an amazing piece of fielding by Pratt, our 12th man, whilst Simon Jones was in hospital recieving treatment. It's rather undignified and does kind of smack of being a bad loser.

Everton lost again this weekend...we seem to be doing a lot of late shopping too. I wonder whether we had a bunch of players in mind and we were wating to see how our qualifier went before working out how much we can spend...either way I hope we can sort ourselves out. WE aren't playing badly but perceptions are important at this stage of a season. If we get that smell of relegation aorund us then it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

In other news Pierluigi Collina has retired...virtually his last action as a ref was to disallow our equaliser. Baldy Italian wanker.


Thursday, August 25, 2005


Everton Football Club

Last night I was too gutted for words...the travelling Evertonians sat in all four sides of the ground kept singing their hearts out as the bare bones of our squad took the field against one of the most highly rated teams in this stage of the competition. They gave everything but just came up short.

It was almost very different...we had two great chances, a ridiculous goal line scramble that just wouldn't go in and one perfectly good goal disallowed. Collina who for many years has been the shining example for referees heeded the Villarreal players pre-match whingeing and picked us up for everything. When it came to the crunch he seemed to have decided there was going to be a foul before the ball was even delivered into the box and as Big Duncan wheeled away in celebration our lifeline into extra time (let's not forget it was only a goal to square the tie) was chalked off.

The night took us through all the emotions but eventually when the dust settled and everything else had ebbed it was pride that was left. The People's Club will abide and prevail and Alan Green can eat his words. We took a superb team all the way. Let's make no bones about it Villarreal are ace, at times they ran rings around us (hats of to Nigel Martyn, beaten by a jemmy deflection for their goal. One finger-tip save in particular was astounding) but we stepped up and at the final whistle you could see how relieved they were.

COME ON YOU BLUES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thursday, August 18, 2005

FAO Alan "foams at the mouth" Green


Oh dear Alan....Everton seem to have upset you by not knowing their place...still I'd have thought a real footy fan like you would have been able to come up with something less childish than exagerations, half truthes and thinly veiled personal criticism.

I'd keep your bitter little no-mark opinions to yourself you fat self-important arsehole.

It's all very well lamenting the fact that the Premiership is uncompetitive but when a team tries to break the stranglehold you see it as your job to mock, sneer and criticise.

Well tough shit...we are going commemorate last season's achievments and of course we are going be proud of being the best team on Merseyside. We were the team everyone thought was going down but instead we put the rich kids in the shade.

Have some respect....or just continue to be a small little no-mark.

"I'll never forgive Everton for finish above liverpool last year"

Been there, done that

Des buts immanquables

many, many times.

I am woeful in front of goal (I was given the nickname Barndoor Brandwood)...this is what my Tuesday night footy games are like. Saying that I still play well....just not in front of goal.

It's nice to see that the professionals are just as bad as me...Diego Forlorn's miss is particularly ironic considering he scored a fairly good goal against us the other week.

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

His Dark Materials by Philip Pullman

I know it's a kids book but it does annoy me how universally lauded these books are.

The first two books were great but I'm convinced that the last book was written years earlier or by someone else. At the very least he must have been under time pressures from his publisher or just bored.

Wheeled elephants and ickle people riding round on dragon flies?!?!?!?!?!?!

Why does it descend into some utterly lame Mills and Boon? Are we meant to believe that all the corruptions and rifts and lethargies and imbalances and all the other problems of ALL the millions of worlds that have been going on for hundreds of years are solved by two kids having a bit of fumble in the forest? What happened with the huge apocalyptic battle to end all battles between The Authority and Lord Asriel? The new, ruthless meritcoracy gathers forces from across the dimensions to challenge the old, corrupt regime.....Three rather shoddily decribed pages then God died of old age (a monumental event which took up all of two lines) and the archangel along with two other central characters fell into some sort of pit......and that was for 200 pages of romantic drivel as bookending.

There are so many things I could ask "What was the point of........" (Those people chasing Will at the start of the book, Where did Asriel's gigantic castle & huge army come from if he only found out how to cross into other worlds at the end of book one, What was that super-duper thought-powered helicopter thingy, those destructive giant swans, the priest-assasin who just gets killed etc etc etc) but the whole thing has become the emporers new clothes so no-one gives you an answer.

Feel free to mail me and put me right on these points but I was SO disappointed with the final part. Instead of being praised to high heaven it should be exposed as the rubbish it is because people are wasting their time reading books one and two and getting to the point of no return and having to press on whilst soft lad is getting very rich off the procedes."


Wednesday, August 10, 2005

The promised land

Well...Champions League. It was fundamentally enjoyable. Villareal were great and to be honest we lived with them. Ultimately the best side won though. It's just a shame we met a team like that in the knockout stage.

Phil Neville made his bow and immediately struck up a raport with the fans. People are already talking about him as a future captain.

We need to score 2 goals in the away leg...can't see that happening. If we'd have equalised I think there would still be a chance. Ah well. A good time was had by all.

Monday, August 08, 2005

Cricket lovely cricket

Now that was FANTASTIC....I've never seen a test match with such a nail-biting end. We've squared the series it's 1-1. We won by 2 runs.

Those damn Aussies never know when they are beaten...they needed well over a 100 runs with their final two wickets and somehow managed to get out of jail (*snigger*) and onto the verge of victory...we needed one wicket but just could not get it. Dropped catches, inside edges, delivaries going past the wicket keeper for 4. It looked like they'd snatched it until at the death Jones caught off Kasprovic's glove and we'd won! Fantastic match. Credit to both teams...It's really shaping up now. COME ON ENGLAND!

Friday, August 05, 2005


Where to start...Last week I was in the south of France doing voluntary work for Liverpool Archdiocese. It was a bit of a saga just getting there as my EasyJet flight from Liverpool was delayed 6 hours meaning my flight took off 30 minutes after my train left Paris. This made a straightfoward day very stressful but eventually I managed get myself on another flight and get down to Lourdes.

Once there I spent my days pushing wheelchairs round and generally making sure Liverpool's sick pilgims are comfortable and don't get lost while visiting the Catholic shrines.

It's busy work but nothing too taxing...there are people who work a lot harder than me (but then again I've only been going for 4 years, there are people who are working there on their 50th).

We spent the evenings and the early hours of the mornings drinking lots of Stella Artois (Do you think that's quite wise sir?). The mornings where a bit hazy (I learnt the hard way : only drinking late with people who are getting up the same time as you). I was staying in a 10 bed dorm with some of the other workers...I think it was actually Great Britain's Olympics snoring is truly astounding how much noise someone can make without waking themselves up.

Lourdes is a bit an enigma...some people are dead set against it before they ever get to the shrines...It is surrounded by a nearly inpenetrable barrier of tat & tack shops (Glow in the dark Our Lady statue anyone? St Bernadette Water feature? Sacred Heart Picture complete with fairy lights? it's all there). The Rough Guide to France was scathing about the place (a lot more scathing that they are about the equivelant 'amazing' Hindu shrines in India). This is a shame 'cause once you get through that and into the actual churches it's all pretty each there own I suppose.

Anyway a good time was had by all I think.

Friday, July 29, 2005

UEFA Champions League draw

UEFA Champions League

Everton have just participated in a Champions League draw.............It could have been worse (the media were talking about a tie against liverpool, cue conspiracy theories) but we got Villareal. They are an impressive Spanish side. It will be VERY topugh to get to the group stages now.

Still..........BRING IT ON! COME ON YOU BLUES! We shall not be moved.

Now the simple matter of getting tickets....their ground is very small and the dates aren't finalised 'til next week when I'm away.

Anyway.........It's nice to be in the CL.

Monday, July 18, 2005


This weekend I was described as 'Normal looking'. I am so proud.

Had a pleasant enough weekend...nice and hot and sunny. Having a house with a garden is proving a real bonus. It's so nice just sitting out under clear blue skies drinking beer and watching the birds flutter by.

Getting a fairly nice tan too.

It's now only 12 days 'til I set off to France for my holiday/noble self sacrifice voluntary work. Really looking forward to it now. This time I am getting down there on my own. Last time I had to lug my backpack plus that of some old dears who had latched onto us. I am not exactly the most muscular of chaps so I'd like to avoid repeat of doing a sherpa impression.

This is the first time I've done the journey solo. The first time I took a coach trip...this was going smoothly until the wheel feel off the bus somewhere in Kent...quite scary at the time let me tell you (we were actually going 60 mph in the middle lane at the time). Anything less eventful than this will be acceptable. It shouldn't be a problem as long as I can get my ass across Paris in 5 hours (Let's face it I could walk it in that time).

In other news Arteta is now fully signed so we just need a good left back and we can approach the season with something getting towards a decent first choice team.

My brother & Claire are now in Mexico, Sophie is in India, I think Harriet is still in NZ, Joost is in Australia and Sara Kay has just got back...The nice weather and lazy, Kronenborg soaked afternoons in the sun are tempering the jealousy.


Wednesday, July 13, 2005


Well The Lions were battered in each of the three tests and the Aussies are beginning to look ominously imposing in the run up to the first test.

I was clearing out newspaper wrack and found my Lions handbook...the entry on O'Driscoll started "A lot is resting on O'Driscoll's shoulders" *ahem* like your entire bodyweight and that of two All Black opponents.

On a lighter not I got my first e-bay star......Yay for me!

Everton are plodding along nicely...rumours are the Arteta is going to sign, we already have a centre half and a right winger (No not Lee Bowyer). We've beaten an Austrian pub side 9-0 with a hat-trick from little James Vaughan and we are meant to have played well against Dundee in a closed doors friendly at Bellefield...curiously the rumour is we had two internationals on trial during that match but everyone involved is sworn to secrecy.

The more I think about it the more I'm glad we didn't break the bank for the likes of Emre, Parker & Forsell....Moyes knows what sort of players will do well. Players like Cahill and Bent who are anxious to take their big chance. Much better than mercurial 'superstars' earning huge money on the backs of their reuptation. James 'The Beat' Beattie has done something truly awful to his hair but he is another player with something to prove...if he knuckles down than the talent he has will come through.

The harder we work....the luckier we seem to get.

I am beginning to look forward to the new season now...I know it's a way off but I can't wait. I have my voluntary work at the end of the month then the Champions League qualifier (I am pretty sure we have enough cash to cover an away trip....hope I can get tickets).



Tuesday, July 12, 2005

Our Ste

Our Ste is keeping us updated with his travels...particularly liked this bit :

"We flew to San Diego via LA which was cheaper than flying to Mexico (or flying to LA on its own oddly enough) and got on the 4th of July for the famous 'England doesn't want our land anymore because their King at the time was mental and they were also fighting the world's 2nd biggest superpower of the day in France' celebrations or 'Independence day' as they like to call it!! We watched the fireworks on a beach over looking the Pacific and there was much Whoopin' an a Holerin' from the colonials there. (they are such a noisy bunch!!) "

Friday, July 08, 2005


Awful, awful you feel was almost overdue. For whatever reason we put ourselves in the firing line by joining in the illegal war in Iraq but inevitably it's normal, decent people who end up paying (just like is happening in Iraq).

I can't imagine how it must be to be caught up in that whirlwind. Either being involved in the actual attack or having a loved one suffer. Truly terrible. It can pull the rug from underneath you, shatter your safe little world knowing that ultimately you can't do anything to prevent every plot and plan.

Growing up in Liverpool meant we were relatively safe from IRA violence. Liverpool is basically a Catholic city and so was spared bombings (Warrington and Manchester are just 20 miles away and weren't) so, in short, I can't offer anything meaningful other than my prayers and best wishes.

God bless

Tuesday, July 05, 2005


Cains IPA | Robert Cain Brewery Liverpool

Cains IPA is now available at the Tesco in Old Swan as is the ever yummy Dilmah tea.

Dilmah Tea


Monday, July 04, 2005

Home and Away

Well interesting weekend of sport...I'll focus on that rather than Live 8 'cause the whole thing struck me as awful

Awful sets from basically everyone I seemed to see ("We are REM and this is what we do..." *sound shit*)

Awful simpering, fawning, coverage.

Awful shots of dickheads and dickhead couples in the crowd.

Awful that they took all the African artists and locked them in a greenhouse as far from London and Edinburgh as possible (then gave them 30 seconds coverage at a time until Dido turned up).

I don't just didn't ever seem to do it...maybe it was the coverage but it never got past being a celeb backing slapping party.

Who was that trainee Jo Whiley doing the banal vacuous interviews backstage and sitting next to the Queen simperer herself on the celeb couch with Jonathon Ross later on?

The thing that set the tone early on was when one band came on, they were half way through the second song when the beeb cut away to a recorded interview of the aforementioned fawining bimbo asking The Killers such cutting and earth shattering questions as "So how old were you when Live Aid was on?.........What do you remember........are you having a good time..........will you be nervous". Then they cut over to the Eden Project for 30 seconds before zipping back to Jonathon Ross so he could have a jokey-jokey laugh with Ricky Gervais.

Anyway I said I wasn't going to focus on it.

The Lions got battered again but at least this time they played. There are times you just have to take your hat off to the better side. The All Blacks were superb, The Lions did themsleves justice but the best side won, it was the same at the Wimbledon final, Roddick was playing well but Federer is just better.

The cricket was ridiculously tense...after England looked like they'd thrown the game away they rallied superbly to get themselves back into the game. They needed 2 from the last ball to tie the final and duly got them. A tremendous effort. Excellent stuff.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

The haka

The first test went about as well as could be expected. We got battered. O'Driscoll answered the haka challenge by tossing some grass in the air...the All Blacks responded by spearing him into the ground within 40 seconds of the kick more BO'D.

Not that it makes any difference...we were 2nd best all game but you do expect better from the All Blacks.

I have a friend out there at present who is going to the 2nd test....they have been instructed to scream blue murder at Umaga and Mealamu. England expects...

As a retaliation the Lions took on mid-table 2nd division side Manawatu and battered them by over 100 points. Ha ha, who's laughing now.

Call me cynical but our new power of four anthem is hardly the right way of going into a game with a bunch of screaming Maori warriors. That there Haka is a very good way of throwing down a it to :

Anyway, As well as someone in Kiwiland I also have a mate currently in Sydney...this coupled with my bro being in South America is giving me itchy feet but for the time being the priority is getting our lovely little house sorted. It's coming along nicely.

Nigel is in another couple of adverts...The boy's a star :

Monday, June 20, 2005

The best bit of post of the year

Mine and Anne's season tickets have arrived and are safely in our possession. It's always an ace moment opening the envelope and getting the ticket in your hand.

I picked them up after footy last week and was looking at them in the pub. A fellow bluenose asked if I'd got my passport up to date at the same time only for a rednose to shout over that we'd only need them once...I looked at my watch and said "Better hurry mate, you lot will be starting their first qualifying match in 5 minutes" he grumbled a bit and shut up.

Even last year when all looked lost actually getting your ticket in your hand was still something special.


Seem piccies of the new kit all we have to do is sign some players!

More cricket success. The Australians have now lost to England, Sommerset, Bangladesh and England again so far. Peiterson's 91 and Collingwoods catch were fabulous (They played the commentary for the catch and you could here the gasp go up from the crowd, Breathtaking is a much overused word but that's the only word to describe that). 5Live were mischieviously asking whether Australia should retain their test status....funny but let's just wait 'til after the test series before passing judgement.

Thursday, June 16, 2005

Not so much a garden...more a James Herbert novel

For a second time since we've moved in I've had to remove enough snails from my garden to feed Paris for a week. Last night I collected at least a kilogram in around 10 minutes. Ugh!

Not having any pellets and lacking the stomach just to dowse them in salt there and then I took them round the corner and dumped should take them a good 2 months to crawl back.

I wonder if I could have taken the squirming bag of escargot to one of the French restaurants in Allerton?

Anyway something needs to be done.

In other news we got in yesterday to find a little hand drawn card dropped in by one of the neighbours. Nice to find such nice people in the street.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

BBC SPORT | Cricket Scorecard

BBC SPORT Cricket Scorecard

I know it's just a Twenty20 warm up game and in the grand scheme of things matters little......but wow. England demolished the Aussies last night. Battered them. We roughed them up too.

England Innings
179 for 8 (20.0 overs)
Australia Innings
79 all out (14.3 overs)

You just don't see scorecards like this from them :

A C Gilchrist 15
M L Hayden 6
A Symonds 0
M J Clarke 0
M E K Hussey 1
R T Ponting 0
D R Martyn 4
B Lee 15
J N Gillespie 24
M S Kasprowicz 3 not out
G D McGrath 5

They'll be like a wounded animal now but battle is joined and it's first blood to us.


The Expeditionary forces aren't faring as well down in Kiwiland though. We got mauled by the Maoris at the weekend and now Lewis Moody is injured. Things may come together for the tests but "Brian O'Driscoll's pride of pussycats" (as the kiwi press are calling them) need to find their best line-up ASAP and losing players like Moody and Dallaglio isn't helping. I had to laugh at one of their newspapers descibing Shane Williams as "small enough to be barred from getting on certain fairground rides".

On the home front Everton seem to be missing out on their first choice signings who favour moves to clubs that will pay them more. Then again if Scott Parker turned his nose up at Champions League footy & £40k per week at a club that's just done something really remarkable in favour of the intertoto cup footy at an anarchic creche managed by a twat and owned by contemptuous & contemptable arseholes (Sorry Newcastle fans) then that's all we need to know.

I am also not too concerned if players are failing our medicals...we can't afford to be paying £30,000 per week for people to warm a treatment table.


Monday, June 13, 2005 :::: MO AWARDED MBE :::: MO AWARDED MBE

Well done Mo. Finally one of my footy team-mates has got an MBE...surely mine can't be far off. I played footy with her in a charidee game ages ago. It's one of my fave claims to fame that I'd played alongside an England captain. She was ace but we still lost...we were playing a bunch of rednoses and another Everton lady (who'll remain nameless) missed a load of chances including a crucial late penalty.

Also recently I played with one of Coventry Ladies...I owe her a kicking but she's just too cool a person to give a kicking to.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

The last night of the Garston riots

Today me and Anne move house...Garston has been good to us and I'll miss the space in our lovely boulevard penthouse (With river view) but you can't rent forever and the area was going to hell in a hand-cart.

Redrow conformity here we come.

I always liked living in L19 however for the last few months it's just been a scallies adventure playground. *Kick shit out of something to provoke the police, give them the run around, scream at you mates that "Ders bizzies everywhere la" *repeat 'til fade**

Carpet bombing the estate between Long Lane and Mather Avenue would have sorted the problem but the railway line might have been hit.

Thursday, June 02, 2005


So the footy season draws to a close with Everton as the 4th best team in the land...the season tickets are renewed, we can't buy the new shirt yet so that's it...we are officially off what do we do with ourselves now then?

Official Website of the British & Irish Lions Rugby Tour

I suppose we'll just have to try and batter some chaps from the colonies.

The Lions tour on New Zealand and then The Ashes...It's what summer was invented for.

The Lions are something I'll just enjoy...for me New Zealand's rugby union team are up in that elite bracket along with the West Indies cricket team and the Brazilian footy team. They have the aura, testing 'yourself' against them is always something special....England Vs The Aussies in anything is always a derby.

Doing well in both test series would be great but given a choice it's the ashes.

Friday, May 27, 2005

::: Holy Moly ::: C*nts Corner :::

::: Holy Moly ::: C*nts Corner :::

This site is ACE ('cause I'm not on it).

"Ghosts : Spooky fucking c*nts. Not to be trusted. Go into the light, you insubtantial shite-hawk c*nts."


Evertonians eh? What can you do?

All of a sudden some folk are in mourning after liverpool's reminds me of a bit from my favourite Father Ted :

FR.TED: What would have to happen this season to keep you happy?

DOUGAL: Ah Nothing Ted...Everton are rubbish and I'm just there for a laugh.

FR.TED: You wouldn't say, want Everton to survive in the Premiership?

DOUGAL Hoo wow! That'd be fantastic. Still being in the Premiership at the end of the season. Yeah that'd be one, oh brilliant.

FR.TED: And what else would have to happen for you to be happy?

DOUGAL: Ah no, that'd be fine. Survival would be fine.

FR.TED: You wouldn't like the blues getting into The Champions League or something?

DOUGAL: Hooo God yeah. I'd love to be in the Champions League like Real Madrid or something. Hoo that'd be brilliant.

FR.TED: So eh, anything else?

DOUGAL: Ah no, that'd be fine. If I had a Premiership place and a place in Europe, I think I could be happy.

FR.TED: You wouldn't want say mmmm.....liverpool to lose the Champions League final?

DOUGAL: Hoo God yeah! I'd love that. If they got beat and we survived AND we were in Europe. That'd be grand.

FR.TED: You've never had much of an imagination, have you Dougal?

DOUGAL: No you're right there Ted.

Some people are actually getting wound up by all this "Everton aren't good enough to represent England, liverpool should take their place" malarkey getting peddled by idiots in the more tabloid side of the media.

For God's sake why do people fall for these agent provocateurs all the time. liverpool haven't's upto UEFA whether they change their rules. There is no way Everton can lose out. People need to relax....otherwise they'll get ulcers


Thursday, May 26, 2005

The tempted fates

That's quite a cool name for a band however it refers to the various goons sending gloating text messages at half time last night. In football counting chickens tends to leave you with egg on your face.

Whatever way you look at it it was a pretty impressive which netted me £40. Don't get me wrong I have preferred them not to win it but Milan looked well shaky in the semi and liverpool (as a lifetime of supporting Everton has taught me) are jammy, jammy bastards. Business is business.

In other news I'm very intrigued by the concept of Sports Arbitrage...If I had time to do it full time it seems a pretty good way of making a living.

Sports Arbitrage Review

It basically is a system of looking at the difference in various bookmakers odds until you notice slight differences in their odds setting up scenarios where you can't possibly lose.

For example if bookmaker A has Tim Henman as 11/10 to *snigger* win a tennis match bookmaker be thinks that actually Greg Rusedski is 11/10 then a bet on both with leds to a small but guaranteed return.

Perhaps the house doesn't always win.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005


Good God...I know the BBC staff were on strike but that doesn't give those who've scabbed their way into work carte blanche to play "You'll Never Walk Alone" on 5Live first thing in the morning.

Shelagh Fogarty, a scouser crossing a picket line, hang your dirty rednose head in shame.


Friday, May 20, 2005


Offline for most of this this week as me and Anne were off spending frightening amounts of cash on white good and furniture for the new house. Think we got everything sorted before the spending limit was reached.

I've discovered that there is no upper limit on what people will charge for a couch. I am also amazed there is a single cow left on the planet judging by the number of leather couches on sale.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

I rock

My bro mailed me today....their bank cards arrived in Buenos Aires on the day they were due to leave. This meant a dash across town to the post office to get them then an even madder dash to the ferry terminal to cross into Uruguay (a full 15 minutes to spare). Phew...they've got their bank cards and are back up & running.

Played footy last night, always fun...did okay but my knee was hurting a lot by the end of it. *sigh*

Monday, May 09, 2005

We shall not be moved.

The People's Forum

Erm....I don't know what to say. I thought I'd be bouncing off the walls however in the event it just a smouldering layer of confused happiness. Everton will finish the season 4th, above our lovable local neighbours and in a Champions League qualification spot. I am still kind of stunned.

On Saturday Goodison was nervy and started off happy enough. The Gwladys Street roared into life (We even had a chrous of The Royal Blue Mersey) but as the game progressed jitters set in for both fan & player alike. It was sheer relief when Davie Weir snuck in at the back post to knock a header into the Park End goal. After that it seemed a bit more straightforward (Tim Cahill suckered one of their players into swinging at him...adios my stupid Geordie friend) and we finished the game 2-0 to the good and 6 points ahead of liverpool & Bolton. A wonderful way to end a fabulous season. Goodison was awash with happiness "We shall not be moved", "We're looking down on the redsh*te" and "We're the pride of Merseyside" echoed from the rafters. The final whistle went and that was it............................erm........Wow.

The players paraded round the ground and we saluted them like the heroes they are. We all knew that one more point would see us guaranteed 4th....touching distance from the unthinkable. Some bluenoses point out, quite rightly, that it's sickening that 4th spot is being touted as the ultimate glory. Nil Satis Nisi Optimum means that we should be craving the league title and our 10th championship....Still, in this day and age of the G14 rich-kids only club 4th place with a truly laughable budget is a pretty fine how to celebrate?

If there is a finer matchday pub than Tha Black Horse on County Road then I really look forward to visiting it. Decent beer, nice staff, lots of televisions tuned to the footy and a top bunch of bluenoses with which to enjoy it all with. After the match on Saturday the place was rocking and even the most cynical & unemotional Evertonian was beaming with happiness at what our side has done this season. We sang ourselves hoarse and realised what it meant to everyone. Even the most optimistic blue bought their season tickets convinced we were on our way out of the Premiership. When we predicted headlines of "Everton on the brink" we didn't think it would be the European elite we'd be on the brink of. Yet there we were....smiling and hugging each other and trying to put it all into words. At the end of the day we gave up and joined in the singing.

Sunday was a nervy affair.....liverpool could still take our place from us. They had the difficult task of beating Arsenal at the first half the Gunners battered them and went into the break 2-0 to the good. The second half was utterly comical dive from Alonso was rewarded with a free-kick that was deflected into the net and in North London and Merseyside backsides began to twitch. Arsenal spent the rest of the half defending for their lives but held out and in the end won 3-1. We were there....and I'm still not sure what to make of it all.

We've been in the top 4 since mid-September...we are there on merit. Champions League here we come. "We shall not be moved!"

Friday, May 06, 2005

Well that went as well as could be expected fellow electoral roll members aren't as stupid as Howard, Letwin & Lynton Crosby were hoping. I am a Labour voting Liberal coward...The Conservatives "Are you thinking..." campaign pushed me right back into the Labour fold despite being very dissillusioned with Tony Blair et al.

As events unfolded the BBC gasped and predicted doom for Labour. The exit poll predicted a Labour majority of over 60 but every snippet of information was dissected and presented as further evidence that Labour should be very, very worried. Jeremy Paxman & Peter Snow were like pigs in sh*t...all very dramatic. Then at 2am I turned over to ITV to find them 40 results ahead and basically saying everything was going as expected.

As it turns out they were dead right...all that missed sleep for nothing. A reduced majority is about right I think. As far as I can see though the Liberal attack on the Conservative vote didn't materialise. We were looking forward to Howard and Letwin's seat being threatened but it didn't really happen. Charlie, Menzies and the boys just seemed to pick-up anti-Labour protest votes. Plus ca change.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Drinking Games

Drinking Games at Bar-None

Is it a sign you've got a problem if you dream of perfectly well thought out, playable drinking games? In my there was a game called Kangaroo Court where upon a person makes an accusation towards the rest of the people there, if a person is guilty as charged he/she must stand on there chair and down their pint (possibly with lots of people singing 'down in one' or 'hang the bastard high' as it is downed).

If the no-one is guilty or more than one person is guilty then the accuser has to do the honours....once the pint is finished the person can turn super-grass and throw out another accusation to the floor.

My sub-conscious, it would seem, is a member of some un-named rugby club.

In other news my impersonation of Lucy Montgomery (Voice of The Museum of Everything) is far too accurate for comfort and I can't the get horrible thought of Nicolas Parsons propositioning Julia Hartley-Brewer on Have I Got News For You out of my head.


BBC NEWS | Election 2005 | Poll Tracker

BBC NEWS Election 2005 Poll Tracker

It appears that the BBC are going into overdrive sniping at anything Blair does or says (I don't mind this but the up-shot of it all might be Howard et al running the country for the next 4 years).

It's polling day on Thursday and I've still got that sick feeling that despite everything the Labour vote is going to stay at home or register a Lib Dem protest vote whilst all those little Englanders have just the excuses they need to vote for Howard & Letwin et voila.

*SIGH* Hope not......what does it say about us if we all jump on a band wagon whose main thrusts are limits on Asylum & immigration, cleaner hospitals & lowering tax (a band wagon being driven by the son of an illegal immigrant asylum seeker who was a member of the government who privatised the cleaning of hospitals in the first place & who had to sack his party chief for admitting they had a hidden agenda on taxation). Are people really not thinking what I'm thinking?

Friday, April 29, 2005

More Euro confusion.

BBC SPORT Football Europe Liverpool suffer new Euro setback

It would appear that the entire nation have decided that Everton are DEFINITELY going to finish 4th and the rednoses are definitely going to win the Champions League. Personally I think Everton have been so up and down since Christmas. I'd not be surprised if we stumbled in the home straight. The manager and players have papered over the cracks brilliantly, results like Villa away and Palace and United at Goodison were tremendous but all too often we've looked like we were running on empty (Blackburn, West Brom, Birmingham and Southampton). Anyway the noise UEFA seem to be making are positive. A win against Fulham tomorrow would be a fabulous result for us and let's remember whatever happens we are in Europe when at the start of the season everyone I know would have been delighted with 40 points and 17th place. The problem is that our lovable neighbours are ridiculously jeckyl and hyde this year. The win games thay've no right to and lose to the most unlikely opposition imaginable. It's been a very odd season.

Wednesday, April 27, 2005


My mate Nigel is in another advert....this one he actually get's speak in it.

As far as we can all tell he is playing himself. Good you Nige.

No footy last night.........getting old...the amount of sore knees we get these days.

Poor old Amber

My boss is a Tory and there's a bloke on The People's Forum who reckon's he supports them (Though it does look like a wind up sometimes). I also have a good mate down in London, I've never really talked politics with him but he plays polo....this guarantees he's a Tory surely.

Apart from one or two people I come into contact with I don't really know any Conservatives. Liverpool is Labour through and through (Some people refer to my home seat of Bootle as a rotten borough.

I read an article in The Times about our local Conservative candidate Amber seems she walks a lonely path. Good luck to her but tough shit.....Liverpool was decimated by her lot last time. I always hated Thatcher but only in a 'bogey-man' sort of way. She was evil...I didn't know why she just was. I remember Tebbit saying how people should get on their bikes and look for work it clicked then. Half my family was on the dole and that bastard was basically calling them feckless and lazy, all his little-England middle class party conferencers cheered and roared their approval. They didn't give a flying f*ck about Liverpool and it's problems. I think more than anything I'll always be and anti-tory voter. Living in Liverpool I'll never get a chance to do it though. 60-70% of the vote goes to our New Labour saviours, this is virtually guaranteed. is an interesting one though. Good old Billy Bragg, (One has to wonder what Red-Wedge would make of Tony Blair et al though).

Tuesday, April 26, 2005


I still can't get over a rampant fear that Howard and his Conservative chums are going to sneak in next week. This, I feel, would be a disaster. There campaign is reprehensible, playing on people's fears and capitilising on knee-jerkers with oportunistic quick-fix promise. The main problem is that I can go ahead with my long standing drunken boast that I'd be off to New Zealand the second the right wing scum get it.

By right wing I of course mean The Conservatives....although let's face it there isn't that much difference between the two main parties. If only I had the guts to vote Lib Dem....Charlie, Menzies and the boys would probably be my preferred choice however the claims of "Go to bed with Charles Kennedy...wake up with Michael Howard" are pretty well observed. What to do, what to do. I can'r shake this attitude much to the chagrin of my Lib Dem supporting friends (Sorry Themi...I'm a bottler).


Everton are in Europe.


I am chuffed.........God bless David Moyes and the Everton players. You are heroes.

Now all we need is somewhere nice in the draw. UEFA cup qualification is wonderful but there is still a chance we can get into the Champions League! It's ours to lose, 2 wins out of 4 will do it but our legs look very heavy in some games. COME ON YOU BLUES!!!!!!

Friday, April 22, 2005

Childish but fun

lots of wholesome anti-tory fun to be had at:

If I had any balls I'd be out defacing the real thing. How hard is it to keep a hospital privatised the cleaning staff you hypocritical scum. Howard's own father was an asylum seeker and, at one stage, an illegal immigrant. There campaign makes me sick.

Thursday, April 21, 2005


What a night.........Everton 1-0 Manchester United. First time in 10 years we've beaten them. It was fabulous. Goodison was bouncing. From the first minute we went at them, the tone was set. We usually just let them set the tempo, we got into them and rattled them from the off. Usually United revel in it when a team tries to get amongst them....Arsenal are far more brittle.

We scored with 35 minutes to go....Big Dunc putting in a header from an Arteta free-kick. The worlds best defender was nowhere to be seen. The places went BESERK!. Duncan gave everything and basically made Rio Ferdinand look like a sunday league player.

It was all there last night...Gary Neville, wretch that he is, getting himself sent off after the corwd in the Family Enclosure goaded him into booting the ball into the crowd, Ronaldo getting booked for diving. Fun, fun, fun!

There is nothing better than when the blues pull off a result like that. Shuffling along Gwladys St sing The Royal Blue Mersey surrounded by smiles.

Straight down to the Black Horse throat is destroyed today.

God bless David Moyes and the Everton players. COME ON YOU BLUES!!!!!!!!

Monday, April 11, 2005

Wayne who (Updated)

Just a quick note to congratulate James Vaughan. Everton battered Crystal Palace 4-0 at the weekend...a good performance from everyone but especially Mr Vaughan who came on and scored. He is the youngest ever premiership scorer taking James Milner's record and further erasing Wayne Rooney from our record books.

Everyone was ecstatic and the players did a joyous Everton could see how chuffed they were for him. Heart warming stuff.

I've since found out that Everton players make up 6 of the 12 youngest Premiership goalscorers. Outstanding.

Thursday, April 07, 2005

The eagles have landed

Claire and my Bro have arrived safely in South America....I imagine they'll hit a bit of culture shock after New Zealand and Austrlia but they've been away for months now. Machu Pichu and the Nazca lines await them. Jammy gets.

They have had a bit of bother 'cause their bank decided to re-issue their bank cards thus leaving them with no way of getting more cash.

I have to send them to a Posthouse restaurant in Buenos Aires or something. Looking forward to their next batch of pictures.